
CSU Junior Chris Miller (a Health and Exercise Major) will take place in the Rock Paper Scissors League Championships in Acapulco over Spring Break.
Wow. Where was this sort of “sport” when I was in school?
Click here for the story.
If you’re worried that your ro-sham-bo skills are a bit rusty, let me just give you a quick rundown on the so-called “Great Eight” throwing combinations to watch for in this competition:
1- There’s the avalanche which is throwing 3 consecutive rocks- according to the USARPS handbook, this is a devastating offensive maneuver which requires bravado bordering on recklessness to execute
2- The Bureaucrat which is throwing paper-paper-paper- formerly known as “confetti”, the deadpan delivery is the ultimate in passive-aggressive play
3- The crescendo which is paper-scissors-rock: this is a slow building gambit with the final rock throw delivery a devastating coo-de-graw
4- The Denomouent, Rock-scissors-paper- the opposite of the crescendo, this is lulling an opponent into submission before beating him with the most subtle of all possible throws
5- The Fistful of dollars- Rock-Paper-Paper: the rapid switch from offensive to defensive style of play can force an opponent into a vulnerable spot
6- The Paper Dolls- Paper-Scissors-Scissors- an extremely effective gambit against an overly brave opponent
7- The Scissor Sandwich- Paper-Scissors-Paper- the main purpose of this play is to unsettle your opponent through the use of concealed scissors
8- The Toolbox- Scissors-Scissors-Scissors- This play requires steady hands and steely nerves…given the rookie popularity of “rock” this play is not suggested for use against beginners…
And there you have it…..a quick overview of what’s at stake in the 2010 Rock Paper Scissors Championship and how to keep track of all the action from the safety of your couch should you so choose.
I already have proposals in with several federal offices to corner the market on competitive leagues for Red Light/Green Light, Kick the Can, and Mother May I.
Look for the “Mike Casey Championship Series” for all 3 coming to a TV set near you by 2011.